Friday Ad Haiku: Image

Now that the Presidential debate is officially back on (McCain's decided to play for the Jets), my Friday night is set. After I put the new kid to bed, I'll toast democracy with bottles of adult beverages named after a great American patriot.

I'm not going to turn this into a political post. MTLB and WMJP do a much better job meshing politics and advertising on a regular basis.

I will, however, venture a guess as to who the winner will be: whoever sweats the least.

Ask Nixon. People listening to the 1960 debate on the radio said Nixon won. Those watching TV proclaimed Kennedy the winner.

It's about the image. The polish. The packaging.

Debating the state
of our economy in
a thong? Got my vote.


Previously in the Friday 5-7-5: Product Placement

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Friday Ad Haiku: Product Placement

Watched the latest episode of Entourage and couldn't help but notice the gratuitous Bud and Bud Light placement.

Product placement is heady business. It either makes sense for the character and story, or it doesn't; it blends in if it does and distracts if it doesn't. But I'm more likely to believe long-necked aliens scarf down Reeses' Pieces than I am that Bud light longnecks are the first choice of musical icons and faux celebs.

I'm a bad check away from homelessness half the time, and even I can pony up a few extra bucks for a sixer of something that's not consumed from novelty hard hats with tubes.

I see where they're going, of course. After the InBev coup de tat, the marketing boys are looking for smarter (read: cheaper) ways to push the brand. Placement in a popular TV series--whether it makes sense storywise or not--is Bud's version of spending wisely. Especially when you consider their pre-InBev marketing budget meetings probably looked a lot like Scrooge McDuck taking a dive into the money vault.


Here's to product placement.

Horatio Caine's
been shot! Quick! Somebody get
me a Diet Coke.
Previously in the Friday 5-7-5: The Traffic Department

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Friday Ad Haiku: Finding the Muse

It's days like these, when the ideas hit the skids, that I start thinking literary boozehounds like Faulkner and Hemingway may have been on to something. Writers, artists, adpeople: drinkers all.

So for you creatives out there who've developed Little Orphan Annie cataracts from staring at the blazing, bleached whiteness of a blank Word doc, I think it's a capital idea to lose yourself in the warm, familiar embrace of a happy hour, post haste--for the sake of your craft. Slide the Jameson out of your desk drawer and get to it. Bukowski would have wanted it that way.

Though ideas aren't at
the bottom of the bottle,
I still like to look.

M.M.McDermott, ACD/Flawed Protagonist


Previously in the Friday 5-7-5: Vacation Hangovers

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"It's funny because it's true."

Dear Jane Sample (via Ugly Doggy) already beat me to it, but that's never stopped me from totally taking credit. Thanks to my broham, G-Money Grip from Coke, for the tip.


Creating A Stop Sign - Watch more free videos

M.M.McDermott, ACD/Focus Group Approved

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Heat Stroke Non-Sequitors

I don't complain about weather. But with temps in Baltimore licking 100 degrees and the humidity somewhere between rain forest and bathtub fart, even I started to get a bit whiny this past weekend. It was a gradual escalation of pissing and moaning, like the way kids get when you take them shopping; starts with a few whimpers outside of Gap and ends up with them sprawled out under a mannequin in Sears begging for ice cream. (Note: I won't be a parent until September, but I subscribe to the theory of giving whiny kids "something to cry about." In fact, I'd start a charity if I could: Give Kids Something to Cry About ™ . For just a kick in the ass a day--less than a cup of coffee--you can make an instant difference in the life of a child who's crying for no good reason.)

Anyway, I'm lying on the living room floor (the only air conditioned part of the house) watching the entire first season of Mad Men on-demand. And I come to the realization that I was born in the wrong era. Sure, riding my bike around the office, laying down astroturf in the writer's lounge, and Photoshopping Ronald McDonald into Edward Hopper paintings have their charms, but can they really compare to working in the industry in the middle of the 20th century? Fedoras, political incorrectness, and Scotch that flows as free and easy as the mighty Mississippi. All punctuated by big ideas that rippled far beyond the context of simply advertising products; they became ideas that shaped our cultural identity. Big ideas for a small world.

Today, the ideas have to be even bigger to even get noticed, because the world has gotten "harder". Consumers are more sophisticated, more wary, more unwilling to put up with interruptions.

I wonder how Don Draper would do in today's ad industry? I need to lie on the floor and think about it.


M.M.McDermott, ACD/Hot Mess

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Peel N' Lick

Apparently Welch's hit it big with their peel and lick campaign, as reported by Ad Age. According to their numbers, 59% of people who chose to rip the grape juice flavored taste strip from the People Magazine advert and actually lick it are more likely to purchase. What Ad Age didn't mention is that these consumers are also:

• 82% more likely to watch American Idol.
• 18% more likely to purchase and enjoy Paris Hilton branded merchandise.
• 207% more likely to get paper cuts on their mucous membranes.
• 73% more likely to eat lead paint chips from the windowsill.
• 51% more likely to arm wrestle you.
• 35% more likely to have gotten a plastic army guy stuck in their ear canal as a child.
• 15% more likely to have gotten a plastic army guy stuck in their ear canal as an adult.
• 56% more likely to fight a raccoon.
• 24% more likely to roll their cigarettes in their sleeve.
• 62% more likely to use the term "irregardless" when telling someone how stupid they are.
• 10% more likely to take bets on how long they can stare at the sun.
• 42% more likely to punch a parking meter after a fight with his stupid girlfriend because she won't get off his freakin' back about getting a job already.
• 8% more likely to dislocate a finger while picking their nose on a roller coaster.
• 64% more likely to Scratch n' Sniff...themselves.
• 35% more likely to taunt a kid in the grocery store.
• 12% more likely to think Al Qaeda is a Mexican country singer.
• 18% more likely to "totally hit that, dude."
• 23% more likely to take part in the Renegade Agency Confessional "Leave Your Car Running in the Garage N' Sniff" promotion.

Of course, this was just a partial list. I'm generally busy doing important things and/or stuff and rarely finish what I start. That includes report reading. Anyone who gets a chance to peruse the whole thing, feel free to post your findings in the comments section. It's 100% more likely you can come up with something better than I can.



M.M.McDermott, ACD/Copywriter/12% more likely to give 110%

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As Advertised: Define "Kills"

Further evidence that Ukraine is NOT weak...when it comes to messaging anyway. Warning labels on their cigarettes have all the gracefulness of an armed robbery.

Rightfully so, I suppose.

Though it hasn't done much to dissuade our intrepid Jr. Copygal from chasing her goal of getting COPD by 30. Dream big!

Previously in As Advertised: Country Climax.

Cancer stick archives: Marlboro Man's back broke...by Camel? and Mickey gets the patch.

M.M.McDermott, ACD/Copywriter/CarcinogenXer

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Friday Ad Haiku: Award Shows

First, some disclosure: a) I've never actually made it to an awards program. I've been to the pre-awards receptions for the free booze, but I always skip out when folks begin filing in to the auditorium because b) I haven't won an award to accept because c) I've never entered anything because d) I'm lazy and/or a hack depending on whom you ask.


But, I've heard the tone and aura of most shows fall somewhere between garish orgies of ego-worship and an elementary school stage production of Caligula. I can't speak to that, but I highly recommend making friends with the bartender at the reception.

Nice trophy, homey.
Got one just like it when our
softball team took 3rd.



Previously in the Friday 5-7-5: The Agency Bathroom



M.M.McDermott, ACD/Copywriter/Hater

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Ecko Rocks the Vote, or Why I'm a Genius.

OK, for the regular readers of this blog (thanks, Mom and Dad!), you may remember my post discussing how to get the maximum marketing mileage out of Barry Bond's homerun ball. Kudos to Marc Ecko for taking my advice (or the advice of someone who shamelessly stole my advice and passed it off as their own) by putting the fate of the ball up for a vote by the masses. Well played, my friend. Well played.

For the record though, I come to not to praise Marc Ecko--only to analyze his approach. So, how's the campaign stack up?

Originality: Grade B+
It’s the best idea ever stolen from me. Consumer voting has been used before, but usually it's been more closely associated with a product (e.g. choose a new color for M&Ms, pick your favorite Doritos commercial). In this situation, he's using it as a brand builder. Ecko, the fashion maverick that he is, understands his demographic. His clothes have always been for The People. Now, his brand is of The People; by providing us everyday folks with the chance to weigh in on an emotionally/historically charged topic, he’s telling us we matter. Yes! Us, 1. Not Mattering 0.

Creativity: Grade B+All right, burning the asterisk into the ball is pretty hardcore. I dig the irony. And sending it to the Hall of Fame is a classy option. But shooting it into space? (Cue cliché 80’s high-school movie slow-clap, building to enthusiastic applause.) Bravo. Granted, I’d still like to see the ball shredded in a wood chipper and mailed to Barry Bonds, COD. Ecko does however miss a prime opportunity to further blend his brand with the fate of the ball. Perhaps pull it apart, make something wearable out of it, then auction it off and donate the proceeds to whales with cancer or, better yet, me.

Impact: Grade A-
At the time of this writing, the vote tally was just shy of ten million. Not bad considering this campaign has existed almost exclusively in forwarded links, word-of-mouth, widgets for people to include on their own sites, and a few national TV interviews. Extra points for the frugality of execution (even including the bazillion dollars he paid for the ball).

Extension: Grade Incomplete
After casting your vote, you’re given the opportunity to submit your email address to receive voting updates and final results. Not sure where it goes after that. I submitted the email addresses of people I don’t like and none of them has complained they've received additional spam…yet. My guess is email lists will be used for further CRM initiatives and sales promotions, eventually.

All-in-all, Ecko’s Vote756.com campaign is a great way to build a little brand equity, if I do say so myself. And as the brain trust behind it, I do. Man, I rule.

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